![]() By Neil Allen “Wait…what? That’s absurd!” I would have said the same thing when my daughter was younger. When she was very young, it didn’t matter as much but as she got older it became a problem. She was getting many presents every holiday and on her birthday that she never opened. She just turned 22 years old and we recently rediscovered some never opened presents from her childhood. I started thinking about this when a friend shared a blog post from the KidsSafetyNetwork that talked about how the author was no longer going to give family members a list of toys to family members. The authors knew that the toys given to their children were either going to be rarely used, become the latest canvas for their art, get scattered everywhere, or join a pile of body parts from dismantled dolls and action figures. It sent me down memory lane as I thought about the presents from my childhood that I have carried around for 35+ years as I moved from place to place — a Heidi doll that my grandparents bought me when visiting Europe (it was a favorite book when I was a kid), a panda PJ bag, a vest my aunt crocheted for me, a piggy bank my uncle made in his pottery workshop, and a doll sleeping bag that I made when my mom taught me how to knit when I was like 9 years old. You’re unlikely to avoid your child begging for the latest toy craze or the really cool toy their best friend has, but you can minimize how many other toys make it into your house and encourage family members and friends to think outside the gift box. Here’s a list of some alternatives:
If you’re one of the people seeking to buy your grandchild or niece or nephew a holiday present, trust the parents to know what their child really wants or needs. It is really is one of the best way to make sure that the present is remembered next week much less years from now. And, you could be passing along family traditions or skills that could be used for the rest of their lives. What are some of the alternative presents you’ve gotten for children? We welcome you to share your suggestions in the comments section!
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![]() By Neil Allen As Thanksgiving approaches and we start preparing for the yearly tradition of dinner with the family, it is a good time to think about what daily traditions we have and how to use them to strengthen our families. One of the easiest ways to do this is with family dinner time. For many of us, dinner time is the only time during the busy day that the family comes together and are all in one place. When my daughter was younger, one of the things a former boyfriend insisted upon was sitting down at the table for dinner and talking about the day. It was really nice. There were no rules around it but it was also a bit before technology took over our lives. Jamie Reimer from “Hands On As We Grow” website recommends three rules to help make dinner time more focused: no technology at the table (cell phones, tablets, gaming devices, etc.), no negative comments, and the conversations need to be meaningful. The only rules I would add is that everyone has to be part of the conversation so no one is able to have a monopoly on the dinner time and that no one can give one or two word answers. What can you talk about? If you do a search on the Internet, you’ll be able to find dozens of questions to promote conversation. The kinds of questions that will be good for your family will depend on the age of your children and the kind of conversations you want to have — “asking about things that happened during the day” or fun questions. You can put a bunch of the questions on individual pieces of paper then pick a new one out every night. Some questions you can ask about the day:
Some fun questions you can ask:
Hopefully these will lead to many interesting conversations for you and your family. Please share some of your favorite questions and answers in our comments. |
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![]() At TLC Family Resource Center we support and strengthen all families, children, and youth in Sullivan and Lower Grafton counties with a wide
range of free programs, support groups, education, and events. Media Contact: Maggie Monroe-Cassel ![]() 109 Pleasant Street
PO Box 1098 Claremont, NH 03743 603-542-1848 | Fax: 603-542-1846 |
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All rights reserved. If you have any problems on the site, please email here.