​By Nancy Crocker, Pediatrician (retired)

Winter means children will get the common cold (viral upper respiratory infections) more frequently, even two times a month on average. A viral cold often lasts seven to 10 days with the first few days of tiredness and fever (greater than 100.4 degrees F). The typical cold symptoms are runny nose, scratchy throat, and cough. After two to three days the fever should resolve. Often the fatigue decreases too.

Then by day four or five, a period of “clearing'” the congestion happens as it “breaks up.” So a wetter cough and a lot of blowing into tissues starts. The mucous may be thicker at this point. Each day the child should improve and be back to normal by day 10 to 14.

What can parents do to prevent and to care for these illnesses?

• To prevent the most severe member of the cold family, the flu, get a flu shot.
• Always offer a healthy diet with plenty of Vitamin C during the winter. Practice good hand washing, and encourage children to cough into a sleeve instead of their hands. This helps to decrease germ transmission. Children also need plenty of sleep.
• Purchase a thermometer and keep it in working order. Have on hand some Tylenol, to use according to the directions on the bottle or by your doctor. (Remember, no aspirin for children!)
• A cool air humidifier helps keep the congestion loose. Remember to keep the humidifier clean.
• Over the counter cold medicines (antihistamines, decongestants and cough suppressants) are not recommended for under two years of age unless your doctor makes an exception. These cold medicines do not cure the cold.
• Keep the child upright as much as possible. This helps them handle the congestion. Raise the head of the bed at night. Keep the nasal passages cleared by using a nasal suction bulb for babies and young toddlers. Try to teach your toddlers to blow their noses into tissues instead of letting them sniffle. Keep tissues readily available.
• Important, if your child is under three months of age and has a fever you must call the doctor immediately. If your child is under two years of age and has a fever you should call your doctor for advice. If a fever lasts more than two to three days in an older child (greater than 2 years of age) then call the doctor.
• If your child of any age has a high fever, trouble breathing, trouble feeding, or has pain then you need to phone the doctor or emergency care office.

​Remember to give your child loving care during their illness. See to their comfort with cuddling, reading books, sipping water, spooning in chicken noodle soup with plenty of tissues nearby!

By Neil Allen

During these last few days before Christmas, many families who are struggling financially are trying to figure out how they’re going to put presents under the tree. Many dread the coming of holidays that require gifts, both in the gifts they give and the ones they receive.

I cannot remember the last time I wasn’t struggling through the holidays. This year is a repeat, though the reasons are different—my daughter and I are purposely living at close to poverty levels as part of our AmeriCorps VISTA service.

I like to use gift giving year round as a time to give both useful gifts mixed with a few frivolous things. Last Christmas, I gave my boyfriend a new nursing scrub top and a winter jacket as well as candy and some other small gifts I thought he would have fun with. This year, my daughter got me a practical gift—a water purifier. I’m allergic to the town’s water and buying bottled water is getting expensive, especially given how much tea I drink these days, so it is the perfect gift.

When you’re struggling to make ends meet, getting practical gifts mean so much more than a frivolous one. Especially when the gift makes normal everyday living easier. They may also be things that they’re less likely to ask for as they don’t seem to be appropriate for holiday gifts.

Here are some suggestions:

• Clothing is great idea when there are children in the family. Children are always outgrowing clothes and it is nice to be able to have something new to wear, especially when they’re used to wearing hand-me-downs. A gift certificate to a store may be a good choice if you don’t know what they like. If you’re giving clothes to an adult, think about what would enhance their life. Is a mom going to be going back to work and needs interview clothes or more business-type clothes for a new job? Does dad work outside in the winter and need heavy flannel shirts?
• If you’re going to give toys, give ones that don’t come with an on-going expense, like batteries or a subscription service. Things like dolls, play cookware sets, board or card games, and building toys like Legos or K’nex, puzzles are great “low maintenance” toys.
• Small appliances that help make cooking from scratch easier make good gifts—not only are they often time savers, they can also allow the family to eat healthier for less money. Things like a rice cooker, which can also be used to steam vegetables, or a crockpot are good choices. I got an ice cream maker for Valentine’s Day from a former boyfriend several years ago and we love using it to make a special treat.
• Other good options include gas or the grocery store gift cards or gift certificates for heating fuel or the garage where they go to get work done on their car or regular maintenance, like an oil change. If you live in an area where there’s public transportation, you could give them a bus or train pass. Coupons for babysitting, handyman services, or other skill are excellent options.

​What gift giving ideas do you have to help families who are struggling financially?

By Neil Allen

When I was a nanny, I had a short-term position with a family in New Jersey with a darling seven month old girl. She was happy enough but she was being held back on her physical and mental development because of her mother’s fears of her getting hurt. She only had rattles and teething toys to play with. She hadn’t even been allowed to just lay on the floor so she could learn to roll over much less begin crawling.

By the end of my first week I went to Toys ‘R Us and made a list of age appropriate toys and added a few things for the next six months. There were probably 20 items on the list from small handheld toys to larger items like an Exersaucer, which allowed for freer movement for the baby and the safety the mom needed. The mom accepted that I knew what I was talking about, then went out and bought everything on the list. The baby’s life was so greatly enhanced and she started developing in leaps and bounds.

The need for age-appropriate toys is simple: to encourage development and provide your child with challenges that build on the skills they’re developing. The toys don’t have to be store bought, there are many you can make from items around the house or recyclables, and, depending on the age of the child, be made with the child. Children need as toys to help them learn to master skills they should be learning from babies to early elementary school. As kids get older, there is a lesser focus on toys and they tend to move to educational games on the computer.

Learning, however, can be done anywhere, at any time — with and without toys. Learning opportunities are everywhere. Vroom, an educational program, can help those with very young children expand the educational opportunities with just a small investment of time. Click here for more information.

Tips

• When it comes to birthdays and holiday present giving, encourage family and friends to buy toys that are for six to nine months down the road so that when the child gets to that point they have toys with new challenges without having to spend more money.
• Children also need variety as they grow tired of the same old toys after a few months, which can stagnate development. It is good to have some toys hidden away to swap into the mix of toys. Take three or four toys that they’re bored with and replace them with new ones that offer new development and challenges. This helps save money, too.
• As your child starts outgrowing the toys, weed them out of the toy box. This helps eliminate clutter and encourages them to play with more age-appropriate toys.

​Simple homemade educational toys
Lacing: Using thick paper, cut out a large shoe shape then punch four holes along each side to replicate the holes on a real shoe. Hand to your child with a lace so they can practice lacing. You can also cut out simple shapes like a bear or gingerbread person then punch holes around the edges for them to practice lacing. If you want them to last longer, you can laminate them.

Felt books: Cut out rectangles about 3″ x 5″ from felt then use iron-on fabric hem tape or sew on numbers, shapes or fabrics with different textures. Then use a hole punch to put a hole in the upper left corner then tie the pages together with yarn or put them on a metal ring.

Rock paths: Find a bunch of flat rocks about two inches long. Clean them then allow them to dry completely. Line them up in a unique shape and use non-toxic paint to create a path from one rock to the next and allow to dry completely. Then, mix the rocks up and have your child try to recreate the path.

​Memory game: This is a great way to recycle old business cards. You can draw pictures on the blank side or use stickers. You can also use matching holiday gift tags that are blank on the backside and all the same shape. You can laminate them to make them last longer.

By John Monroe-Cassel

During the holiday season, there will be the inevitable interplay of cheer and “oh dear” as families who have experienced difficult times, even deaths in the family, strive to cope and adjust to the challenges. When hard times hit at holiday time, families often are at a loss for how to get through the season.

The following are some tried and true ways people have succeeded in making a time of deep sadness or grief during a cultural time of joy and glad tidings survivable and maybe even special:

• Find the information about grief that helps your family experience and even talk about the sadness of losing a family member. Helpful materials can be found online, just type in “holiday grief” and many resources will appear or in your public library. Librarians are excellent resources for finding relevant reading material to meet your particular need.Local funeral homes have materials on site and on their websites that many have found helpful. Call your local Visiting Nurses Association (VNA) and hospices in the area and ask to speak with their bereavement coordinators and/or spiritual care professionals or check out their websites, as well. Churches may have materials about loss and difficulty suitable to your religious tradition, and if you have a pastor or rabbi or imam who is close to your family, he or she may be an excellent source of support.

• Give members of your family a break from the usual banter families experience during tense times: everyone grieves loss differently, even within the same family unit. Instead, find time and activity that brings people together and encourages lighter moments of enjoyment.

• Talk with each other about which holiday practices, activities, and traditions are essential to keep and which are ok to put aside maybe for just this one season. Families are not well-trained to discuss these things, so give each other plenty of time to explain why they think we should or should not do this year. For instance, maybe this year if you hang stockings a stocking can be hung for the person who is not with you due to illness or death, and family members can write on a piece of paper what they miss or how much they love that person and put the paper in the stocking. Absence of person does not mean absence of love.

• MOST IMPORTANTLY: Talk with each other about the gratitude you have for the one who is gone but who gave you all the best of who you are. By focusing on gratitude, thankfulness, wonder and delight at what he/she meant to you while he/she was alive, the season becomes less about the sadness of loss and more about the meaning of ongoing love.

Every family has the ability to adjust to even the most painful circumstances, and there is no substitute for working together toward the most effective and meaningful togetherness possible when this is needed most. This meaning-making puts the “holy” in holi-day!

​John Monroe-Cassel, MDiv., MAT, is Spiritual and Bereavement Care Counselor for Lake Sunapee Region VNA and Hospice and has worked with individuals and families for many years in several different states as counselor, pastor, chaplain, and bereavement coordinator.