![]() By Sarah Breisch “I don’t know how you manage seven. I can barely keep up with two!” I hear this often from women I meet while shopping or walking or any other activity to which I’ve brought along a few of my kids. I feel obliged to tell them the actual number of kids I have when they see two or three with me and ‘helpfully’ tell me that I’ve got my hands full. I would like you to know, gentle readers, what a mother of seven thinks when she hears someone tell her that they can’t understand how she can handle that many when one, two, or (gasp) three children seem like too much. My thoughts run thus: Either she is an inept mother, or I am extraordinary one. Neither of these are true. We are both good mothers. She works just as hard raising her children as I do mine. The number of kids one has is ultimately irrelevant; having more or less does not make one more or less of a parent. We both “succeed” at being good mothers when we attend to the needs of our children and raise them up to be wonderful people. No, my friend, I am not amazing because I have seven kids and am still functioning, nor are you somehow deficient because you have fewer and feel overwhelmed. We both do our best with our own circumstance, and that is what matters. Of course I don’t articulate all of this in the produce section while my two-year-old is trying to eat all the grapes. I just shrug and say something like “Oh, I don’t manage.” So now this woman thinks I’m not only crazy, but possibly dangerous. Or hopefully she understands that I do not want to diminish her work as a parent by thinking too highly of my own. As I have matured along with my children, however, there have been a few habits that have developed in my household that makes life with a large family possible. Over the next few weeks, I would like to share some of the strategies that have helped me get along with the crowd of wonderful, fascinating, and unique people whom I have helped to come into the world. These topics will include:
Everyone has a different set of circumstances that make their day-to-day living more or less of a challenge. Some of us rent, and we cannot control our living conditions to some extent. Some of us do not have the support of a partner who is invested in the care of their children. Some of our children may present with special needs or challenges of their own. I hope that these words will enable any parent to feel encouraged, inspired, or even just amused.
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